Alright, lovestruck culinary adventurers, this one is for you. We’re about to embark on a gastronomic journey through Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, that’ll make your taste buds bachata and date swoon. Forget run-of-the-mill tacos and margaritas—we’re deep diving into the crème de la crème of the local dating scene.
La Leche
Walking in, you’d be forgiven for thinking you’ve stepped into a stark white asylum, but instead of a straightjacket, you’re greeted by an intoxicating aroma of a culinary genius. Welcome to La Leche, where Chef Alfonso Cadena serves up dishes so avant-garde they make most other places you’ve been to look like a paint-by-numbers hack.
The menu changes daily. Consistency is not the expectation here–genius is. One day, you may be served a deconstructed ceviche that looks like it’s been through a particle accelerator, and the next, a steak tartare is set on fire tableside.
But let’s talk about their signature dish: the catchily named “Leche de Tigre.” It’s a potent invention of raw seafood, citrus, and chili served in a hollowed-out coconut. “Leche de tigre,” or tiger’s milk, is a Peruvian term for the citrus seafood marinade in ceviche and is also known as leche de pantera. In Peru, the stimulating elixir is frequently served alongside ceviche in a shot glass and is considered a hangover cure and an aphrodisiac.
The cocktails are equally inventive. Try the “White Russian,” served in a miniature bathtub with a rubber ducky.
The staff at La Leche seem to float around the space in pristine white uniforms, looking like they’ve stepped out of a mid-nineties electro video—but in a good way, and they explain each dish with a sense of reverence usually reserved for announcing life’s big things. It’s jarring and actually kind of perfect. But is it pretentious? Yes. And is it delicious? Totally. Will it make for an unforgettable first date? You bet your artistically plated bottom dollar it will.
El Solar
Make a note of this because we’re about to introduce you to the kind of place that’ll make you question everything you thought you knew about Mexican cuisine. El Solar isn’t just a restaurant; it’s a revelation wrapped in a corn tortilla, deep-fried in attitude. Located in Puerto Vallarta’s Zona Romantica, El Solar looks like the place one opens after a three-day tequila bender: the walls are a riot of color, the tables are mismatched, and the ceiling… well, there isn’t one. And this “devil-may-care” vibe continues with the menu. Forget Tex-Mex abominations and bastardized burritos—this is Mexican as a love letter to local ingredients, each dish a middle finger to culinary exploitation.
Start with “Tostada de Pulpo” octopus, grilled until tender enough to spoon, perched atop a crispy tortilla, dressed with a habanero aioli that’ll make you see double—or possibly the triple— depending on your spice tolerance. For the main event, try the “Cochinita Pibil.” This classic pork dish almost single-handedly defined the meaning of slow cooking for so long. It is served with pickled onions so sharp they may well cut glass and a stack of soft tortillas.
But the real star of the show is the mezcal. These aren’t your schlocky worm-in-the-bottle tourist traps. Instead, you get small-batch, artisanal mezcals that’ll make you question why you ever wasted your time with tequila. The bartender will guide you through the selection with the gravitas of a sommelier and the twinkle in his eye of a man who knows he’s about to blow your mind. Neat mezcal is a revelation. The El Solar atmosphere is electric, a buzzing hive of relaxed locals and happy tourists who’ve stumbled upon a gem. The music is loud, the laughter even louder, and the whole place vibrates with an energy that’s part fiesta, part communal experience.
Is it romantic? It depends on your definition. If your idea of romance means shouting sweet nothings over a mariachi band wiping habanero sauce off your date’s chin, then yes, it’s practically Casablanca. But all this feels unimportant as El Solar is the kind of place that’ll give you and your date something to talk about. Whether discussing the complex flavors of the cochinita pibil or getting into the vibes and mezcal, this is the kind of place that makes memories.
Ocean Grill
Now, land lovers, read on. This one may be for someone else. I’m about to tell you about a dining experience more exclusive than a royal tea party and more thrilling than shark cage diving. Welcome to Ocean Grill, where getting there is half the adventure, and the other half is trying not to fall off the cliff while you’re eating.
First things first: one can’t drive to Ocean Grill. Nor walk, taxi, or Uber. To get to this culinary wonderland, you will have to take a boat—like something out of a Bond film. The journey takes one along the coast, past secluded beaches and hidden coves, until you arrive at a tiny jetty jutting out from the base of a cliff. From there, it’s a short but steep climb to the restaurant. If you’re not slightly out of breath, questioning your life choices by the time you reach the top, you’re either an Olympic athlete or way fitter than you thought.
Ocean Grill is precariously perched on the edge of a cliff like a particularly ambitious eagle’s nest. The views are spectacular. On one side, the endless expanse of the Pacific. On the other, the lush jungle of the Sierra Madre mountains. It’s the kind of view that makes you want to propose on the spot, even if you’ve just met and can’t remember their name. It’s just that kind of place.
As you might expect from a place called Ocean Grill, seafood is the star of the show. The menu changes daily depending on what the local fishermen have managed to wrest from the sea, but there are a few constants. The ceviche, for example, is a must-try—super fresh—served with a side of crisp totopos.
For the main course, you can’t go wrong with the whole red snapper. It’s grilled to perfection over an open flame, its skin crispy and flesh succulent. It’s served with a garlic butter sauce that’s so rich and flavorful you may be tempted to drink it from the cup.
Another showstopper is the Tuna Tostada. A tower of crispy tortilla, creamy avocado, and seared yet rare tuna topped with a chipotle aioli that packs just enough heat to make you reach for a drink, which brings us neatly to…
The cocktails. The Mezcal Mule is a standout. It’s like the Moscow version that went on holiday to Oaxaca and returned with a newfound appreciation for smoky spirits. It’s dangerously sippable, which is slightly concerning given the precarious location of the restaurant.
Ocean Grill is the kind of place that makes a date feel like the beginning of a great love story. The combination of the journey, the location, the food, and the drinks creates an experience that’s nothing short of magical.
Café des Artistes
Located in the heart of Puerto Vallarta’s old town, Café des Artistes is Chef Thierry Blouet’s brainchild. As you approach, you’ll notice the building looks like what would happen if a French château had a torrid affair with a Mexican hacienda. Wrought iron balconies are wrapped in geraniums, with a dash of surrealism thrown in for good measure.
Step inside, and you’re transported to a world that’s part art gallery, part jungle, and part fever dream. The walls are adorned with abstract paintings, and tables are set precisely. And the lighting… well, let’s just say if you’re planning on Instagramming your meal, you might want to bring a spotlight
Start with the “Foie Gras Crème Brûlée,” a dish so decadent it’ll make you look twice. There’s the classic terrine, a seared lobe that’s crisp on the outside and molten within, and foie gras ice cream that’ll make you question everything you thought you knew about dessert. It’s served with a variety of fruit compotes and a brioche so buttery it should come with a warning.
For the main course, depending on availability and season, try the “Lobster in Black Mole Sauce.” The lobster is sweet and tender. But the real star is the mole—a sauce so complex, so layered; it’s one of the true wonders of the culinary world. It’s got chocolate, it’s got chili, it’s got about 27 other ingredients that’ll make your taste buds go wild, and it’s served with a side of rice that’s been dyed black with squid ink.
Café des Artistes is the quintessential date restaurant. The kind of place that’ll make you feel—and look—sophisticated beyond your years. But you know what? Sometimes, you’ve got to push the boat out. And if you do it, you should do it somewhere that serves lobster in mole.
